Lay's French Onion dip

in between helping my friend write a paper for his communication class and texting my favorite friend from back home, i've spent the last hour or so re-reading all the entries from my blog before i deleted it. man, i have some typooooos. but i know i am not perfect, so it happens. at first i was going to go back and fix them because i am in fact an obsessive compulsive, but i am not ashamed of my typos. and i feel sorry for anyone who expects every aspect of my blog to be perfect. my apologies if my mistakes are unacceptable to those who read my blog. but just a heads up, there will be plenty more where they came from. :)

on another note,
i'm realizing that my state of serenity and apathy is causing a little bit of tension between myself and those who are used to 'the old makensy.' that is another situation in which i do not know what to say to those folks. i apologize for having emotions? that my feelings about certain things change depending on certain situations. i apologize that at times i am sad, and at times i do not wish to be around people. i apologize that sometimes i am happy, but still simply do not wish to be around people. i apologize that at times i am not easy to be around and that is why i take myself out of certain situations - trust me on this one, just be glad i take time to myself every once in a while. i apologize that it takes much more energy from me to be around certain people than others -- energy that i do not always have. i apologize that sometimes i am simply tired and do not wish for company. i apologize that sometimes that my emotions sway so drastically that i am not ecstatic all of the time.... it is not that i do not like you or enjoy your company, but sometimes it is not about you, it is about me.

i apologize lastly because i do not apologize for any of that.
everyone is like that. everyone needs time to themselves.
to take it personally would be foolish. to be mad that someone is
at a point in their life where they experience emotions that you may
not understand now and may never understand, would be absurd.
i am a person, with a life no one will ever understand because they have not lived it - to tell me my emotions are uncalled for exemplifies naiveté.